
One of the reason we stopped in
Ulcinj was the Lonely Planet apartment recommendation as ' the steal of the Adriatic....consider yourself king of the castle as indeed the previous owners were'
But - we were stopped by a guy in a beaten up car (first clue) and
suckered in to 'just looking' at his
apartment.
He had a small
hovel in the old town with a separate hovel in the garden. He
wouldn't let us in until he and his wife had moved
some stuff and
tidied up. It was a store room and like the garden full of crap that
should have been thrown away years ago (second clue). It even had an old cooker full of wellington boots!
While we were in the room the door blew shut and the door handle fell off. His son had to climb
on the bed (in his dirty shoes) and climb out of the window (third clue)

When I say beds they were actually wooden crates with a bit of foam thrown over them (fourth clue)
The promised private bathroom was actually the family
bathroom full of their stuff including nappies, a potty and
hundreds of old shampoo bottles ( fifth clue)

When we got back around 11 someone had been into our room and hung a dirty
carpet out of our window.
The family house was locked so we couldn't get to the bathroom. His wife was in but despite using
the broken
door handle to bang on the door there was no way she was going to open it. We both had to pee in the garden
The guy returns about 1.30am and cant get in either so has to throw stones up at his wife's window. He gets in but
of course relocks the door
Marilyn needs a pee at 3am but can't get out of the door. She wakes me to find the handle, mend the door and let her out. I drift off to sleep and
then realise she
hasn't come back. I get up, again, and a pathetic little voice says ' I cant find anywhere to squat in the dark'
This place cost us 20 Euros the same price as a really nice modern room with
ensuite bathroom. I have no idea why we stayed there
Oh and we both got bitten to death


Ulcinj is wonderful town. Great beaches, the old town hasnt been developed, we saw a brilliant hamburger sunset and had a superb fish dinner
Why is that dreadful Palin woman giving Mccane such a boost. I do hope this is just a blip. If only she was related to MichaelPrint Page